Blusher

Dear Frankie,

Was awake at 5am this morning. (Too much birthday cake?) So I did what anyone just into her 45th year would do (my favourite record speed by the way) - I bought a blusher online.

Clearly there are a multitude of things I need - a car that works, a hall carpet that is not threadbare, a cooker that works. Anyway. Some bird in the Guardian would exclaim 'It's the Nars blusher' whenever she bumped into a friend, so used was she to being asked what was different about her.

Apparently "it makes every woman look better, giving all skintones a sexy flush of peachy pink'.

And the name dear reader, of said blusher range? Orgasm.

Basically if you look like you have had a good seeing to, people think you look great.

Blusher = £21.

Sex = Sod all.

I'm in the wrong business.

Read that as you will.

Lub you.

Dobson x